How to Process Emotions: How to let go of anger, sadness, and open to love all the time

Closing down and withdrawing is something many people have perfected.

If something uncomfortable or even extremely joyous happens, if we don’t know how to ground and house the energy or rather, if we don’t know how to stay present and keep our hearts open through the experience, we hide, we shut down.

I remember whenever attention was focused on me I would run away and hide.

I also remember that my older brothers wanted nothing to do with me. My father was always tired from working, and my mother was emotionally unavailable. I made that mean that I was uninteresting, unworthy, and that no one really saw me.

When we are children this might be typical, but as adults we have the option to choose openness and love no matter what. It’s true.

So why don’t we? It’s unfamiliar. It’s like if for years there has been an automatic switch. We haven’t even noticed it. But then we discover oh, this happens because of this control switch right here. We learn we have the power to do it ourselves if we choose to or stay open.

If we choose to stay open though, it requires a heightened state of awareness. What I mean by heightened is that, we must diligently practice, question often, and remain in the seat of the witness.

It is said that when we keep choosing openness, we forget how to close. Doesn’t that sound marvelous? That way we can process our emotions constantly.

Imagine if your life could be filled with constant love, enthusiasm, and excitement. What would that look like for you? How would you show up? What would you do? That’s a great question to start your day.

So then the questions comes: how can we choose to stay with the present moment and be open?
The good news is there are many different paths.

For example, one could be becoming acutely aware of all of your senses. Let them become “loud.” Notice everything you hear, don’t judge, just notice. Become aware of the feeling of your backside sitting against your seat, the back of your legs. Notice anything in your view. Just look without forming opinions or placing past projections.

Notice any smells or tastes. Perhaps you can still taste the bitterness of some coffee you had earlier. Perhaps you can still smell the soap you washed your face with.

Try to hone in on all of your senses at once, without getting pulled into any stories. Almost as if you were in the most advanced technological movie theater. You’re just in the audience. You’re not the character in the movie.

If this is difficult for you, remember it does take practice, but also inciting deep breaths in helps soothe the nervous system so you can drop into the experience of presence.

This is the space where you can allow anything and everything to pass through you. If we also remember that at our core we are perfectly divine, not flawed or diseased, but connected consciousness, we can snuggle up and become a vessel. Imagine that as that vessel, you can have the greatest, deepest inner massage that gets into all the right places, releases all tension and tightness, and leaves you feeling satisfied, relaxed, fulfilled, and clear. That is the experience of being a vessel.
That is the experience of God. That is what we are all seeking. That is what people spend countless hours, dollars, and energy trying to reach and you just created it yourself for free.

It is my honor to guide you. If you are interested in my week long retreat on Anna Maria Island, contact Erin at erin@erincoach.com.

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