I went to an open AA meeting this past Wednesday. The setting was beautiful, right on the beach. The facilitators were friends of mine and I was curious to attend. I myself am not an alcoholic, but I admire people who have had a struggle and have chosen to look at themselves, accept responsibility for their lives, and surrender to the power of god. In fact, those are my people. As we went around the circle, my heart ached for each story as they shared their shame, their vulnerability, and what I most often heard was, “And by the grace of god, I am here and well.”
There was so much gratitude in that circle, so much forgiveness, so much love, and loving ourselves not just on our good days, but during our darkest hours. You could feel it, and I was moved to tears a few times during the meeting. When it came time for my share, I said, “My name is Erin, and I love each and every one of you.” And I truly did. It was so real. It was so refreshing. I saw a part of myself in each one of these men and women. I acknowledged that place inside of me as they did in them. It was enlightening. I learned so much.
Namaste is a word we say in yoga and it literally means, the god in me greets the god in you. All of the people in that circle had met god through their searching and their suffering. As they shared their pieces I found those same pieces in me.
At the end of the session, the facilitator gave me a shell. He said he had made a shell, but he wasn’t sure who for. He said, now he knew that it was waiting for me. Thank you. Namaste.